Forum Itbox

Airman04061969 · Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 4:34 pm Post subject:

OK, inca una:
BEHAVIORAL CHANGES AFTER MARRIAGE

"Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me.
She got me to stop drinking, smoking, running around at all
hours of the night and more. She taught me how to dress
well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music
and how to invest in the stock market."

"Sounds like you may be bitter because she spent so much
time trying to change you."

"I'm not bitter. But now that I'm so improved, she just isn't good
enough for me."
_________________
Bogdan Voicu
("Good judgement comes from experience but experience comes from a lot of (previous) bad judgements").

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Airman04061969 · Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 4:36 pm Post subject:

HIS AND HER ATM HABITS

HIM:
1. p**a up to ATM
2. Insert card
3. Enter PIN number
4. Take cash, card and receipt

HER:
1. p**a up to ATM
2. Check makeup in rearview mirror
3. Shut off engine
4. Put keys in purse
5. Get out of car because you're too far from machine
6. Hunt for card in purse
7. Insert card
8. Hunt in purse for tampon wrapper with PIN number
written on it
9. Enter PIN number
10. Study instructions for at least 2 minutes.
11. Hit "cancel"
12. Re-enter correct PIN number
13. Check balance
14. Look for envelope
15. Look in purse for pen
16. Make out deposit slip
17. Endorse checks
18. Make deposit
19. Study instructions
20. Make cash withdrawal
21. Get in car
22. Check makeup
23. Look for keys
24. Start car
25. Check makeup
26. Start p**a away
27. STOP
28. Back up to machine
29. Get out of car
30. Take card and receipt
31. Get back in car
32. Put card in wallet
33. Put receipt in checkbook
34. Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook
35. Clear area in purse for wallet and checkbook
36. Check makeup
37. Put car in gear, reverse
38. Put car in drive
39. Drive away from machine
40. Travel 3 miles
41. Release parking brake
_________________
Bogdan Voicu
("Good judgement comes from experience but experience comes from a lot of (previous) bad judgements").

tuffgirl · Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 5:30 pm Post subject:

Did your wife see that? And she let you live? LOL

That one was good too, but i don't think, or would like to think, that all of us can be that dumb.
_________________
Those who wish to appear wise among fools, among the wise seem foolish.

- Quintilian, De Institutione Oratoria

Airman04061969 · Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 7:53 am Post subject:

Yes, my wife has seen that. Actually, I'm in coma now. This is an automatic reply from my computer. LOL

_________________
Bogdan Voicu
("Good judgement comes from experience but experience comes from a lot of (previous) bad judgements").

anca · gold member Joined: 21 Oct 2004 Posts: 660

you seem to know everything concerning marriage Very Happy

_________________
I didn't see the time...and I waited half my life away

Airman04061969 · Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2005 11:21 am Post subject:

I do not know everything but I'm a fast learner ! LOL

_________________
Bogdan Voicu
("Good judgement comes from experience but experience comes from a lot of (previous) bad judgements").

Aurasmic · membru Joined: 30 Mar 2005 Posts: 74 Location: Bucuresti

Nu stiam ca sotul meu e atat de "invatat" in ale casniciei ! O fi stiut chestiile astea si inainte de a se casatori cu mine ? LOL

_________________
Da, mai, sunt nevasta-sa lui Airman !

tuffgirl · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 9:01 pm Post subject:

You know, de fiecare data cand te mentzioneaza are mult respect pentru tine shi de cand sunt eu pe aici (pe forum), cand s-a facut aluzie la mai stiu eu ce replica a fost imediat despre faptul ca e happily casatorit. Ma gandesc ca trebuie sa stie ceva Rolling Eyes

_________________
Those who wish to appear wise among fools, among the wise seem foolish.

- Quintilian, De Institutione Oratoria

Aurasmic · membru Joined: 30 Mar 2005 Posts: 74 Location: Bucuresti

Atat i-ar trebui sa nu ma respecte ! Wink

"Happily married" ? Poate el ! Razz

Glumesc, bineinteles. Nu pot sa-i reprosez decat un singur lucru: faptul ca se enerveaza cam usor si pune prea multa pasiune in ceea ce face, uneori indarjindu-se sa faca ceva, chiar daca este in dezavantajul lui. Chestia cu German Shepherd is SOOOOO true !
_________________
Da, mai, sunt nevasta-sa lui Airman !

tuffgirl · Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 4:57 pm Post subject:

Asta numai inseamna ca e pasionat LOL

. Cat de enervat ushor, nu se castiga nimic decat stress si poate un heart attack.
_________________
Those who wish to appear wise among fools, among the wise seem foolish.

- Quintilian, De Institutione Oratoria

Aurasmic · membru Joined: 30 Mar 2005 Posts: 74 Location: Bucuresti

tuffgirl · Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2005 6:45 pm Post subject:

Ma gandeam ca el. Cei care ii sunt alaturi sunt mai mult in danger of a nervous break down. LOL

_________________
Those who wish to appear wise among fools, among the wise seem foolish.

- Quintilian, De Institutione Oratoria

Aurasmic · membru Joined: 30 Mar 2005 Posts: 74 Location: Bucuresti

Pai ce, numai sotul meu e specialist in sfaturi ? Ete, hop si eu ?
1. Cum se numeste un barbat incatusat ?
Unul in care poti avea incredere.
2. Ce vrea sa spuna un barbat care iti gafaie prin pat, se agita fara sa-si gaseasca locul si mormaie ceva ce poate sa insemne o chemare tandra ? Vrea sa spuna ca n-are destula plapuma.
3. De ce numai 10% dintre barbati ajung in rai ?
Pentru ca, daca ar ajunge toti, acolo ar fi iadul.
4. De ce le plac barbatilor femeile istete ?
Deoarece contrariile se atrag.
5. Cum inteleg barbatii sa-si imparta in mod egal sarcinile cu femeile ?
Noi gatim - ei mananca; noi curatam - ei fac mizerie; noi lucram din greu - ei dau sfaturi si indicatii.
6. Cum face un barbat exercitii de gimnastica pe plaja ?
Isi suge burta de cate ori vede niste bikini.
_________________
Da, mai, sunt nevasta-sa lui Airman !

Airman04061969 · Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 8:51 am Post subject:

De cate feluri sunt femeile (a propos ca suntem pe forum IT) ?:
Femeia-Internet: de cele mai multe ori greu accesibila
Femeia-Server:e mereu ocupata cand ai nevoie de ea
Femeia-Windows: toti stiu ca nu e apta,dar nimeni nu poate trai fara ea
Femeia-Excel: se spune ca poate multe,dar e folosita doar pt.cele mai simple activitati
Femeia-Word: are intotdeauna pregatita o surpriza si nimeni nu o intelege in intregime
Femeia-DOS: toti au avut-o odata,dar azi n-o mai vrea nimeni
Femeia-Virus (si ?Sotie?):vine cand o astepti mai putin si consuma toate resursele
Femeia-Scandisk: se stie ca e buna si ca vrea doar sa ajute,dar nimeni nu stie precis ce face
Femeia-Screensaver: nu e de folos,dar te binedispune
Femeia-Harddisk:nu uita niciodata nimic
Femeia-Joystick: pricinuieste bataturi in palma si febra musculara la brate
Femeia-Password: crezi ca esti singurul,dar jumatate din populatie o stie
Femeia-User:nu face nimic ca lumea si cere prea mult
Femeia-E-Mail: din 10 lucruri pe care le spune,8 sunt gunoi
_________________
Bogdan Voicu
("Good judgement comes from experience but experience comes from a lot of (previous) bad judgements").

vrajitorea16 · membru Joined: 19 Feb 2004 Posts: 63 Location: Tg Mures

Desi observ ca sunt cam tare intarziata nu pot sa ma abtin si sa il barfesc un pic pe al meu sot care e un turbat, vesnic enervat si morocanos si care in ultima vreme are ceva cu mine : cica eu comentez si il critic
Asa sa fie oare?
Eu totusi zic ca exagereaza si ar trebui sa asculte mai mult..doar are 2 urechi si o singura gura. Nu?

hai ca e rau sa traiesti cu cineva , dar e oribil sa fi singur
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Persoanele care ne iubesc niciodata nu ne parasesc

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